ZunePony

My mate forwarded this comment from a Slashdot article (I’ve removed the author’s e-mail address):

If Apple made a Magic Pony, would Microsoft?

Steve Jobs, Macworld, 2008: “We’ve invented the iPony!” (pulls back sheet to reveal shining white magical pony prancing on stage) “His name is Starshine, and we made him from moonbeams, fairy dust, suger, spice, and a tiny bit of neatsfoot oil. He can sing, dance, do your algebra homework, and go from 0-60 in 4.9 seconds!”

Steve Ballmer, 6 months later: “We’ve invented the ZunePony!” (pulls back sheet to reveal hideous brown zombie pony with mismatched eyes and visible stitching across its reanimated carcase and reeking of death and sulfer) “His name is Mordheim, and we made him from corpses, discarded auto parts and some leftover copies of Microsoft Bob. He can shamble nearly 20 feet in any direction, emit unearthly screams like a damned soul, and feast on the flesh of the living!” (At this point, the zombie pony stumbles toward the camera and starts eating the brain of an AP reporter. Thankfully, this doesn’t seem to have any impact on the reporter’s career.)

Newstory six months later: “Microsoft says it’s quite happy to capture 2% of the Magic Pony market this year. ‘Just wait for ZunePony 2.0!’ said Ballmer. “We’ve added claws and horns!”

Lawrence Person