Last year I got myself a set of really nice knives. The kind that actually cut shit, because they’re sharp, not because you’re using a lot of force to push them through. I’ve enjoyed using them, I can cut up meat or vegetables without working up a sweat.
Apparently the thing about high-quality knives like this is that you can’t put them in the dishwasher. Seems the metal of the blade expands at a different rate than the resin of the handle, and if you expose them to the high temperatures of machine washing they will become loose over time. So you have to hand-wash them.
Probably not a problem for normal people, but I’m a klutz. So this evening I was washing one of my nice high-quality knives, and I dropped it—onto my other hand.
Being a sharp, high-quality blade, it cut through the meat of my hand very efficiently. I spent several minutes staunching the flow of blood. The Director came out of his room to find out what my cursing and exclamations were about. While attempting to stop the bleeding on the first cut, I discovered a smaller second cut. The knife must’ve skidded while I was trying to avoid it.
I keep picturing Alpha Geek when he comes home, seeing all the band-aids on my hand and asking, “What the hell happened to you?”
“Washed the dishes.”
The sad thing is he wouldn’t even be surprised.